Etched in Sand: A True Story of Five Siblings Who Survived an Unspeakable Childhood on Long Island

But, Etched in Sand in tragic, detrimental ways to children every day, that the system fails them. The fact that ANY child, EVER, must go hungry, be in any kind of abusive situation, be homeless, in THIS country is beyond any kind of reason, or excuse.While I have tremendous admiration for Regina and her siblings, I find myself questioning where the "system" was for these five children and how they managed to remain off the system's radar? How did the school system not "see" any of these siblings in crisis, landlords, neighbors?While I most definitely admire Regina' s success, ability to rise above her very abusive, neglectful childhood to become a very successful adult who has not only defied all the odds stacked against her, but is making a difference with her life. I am concerned that her book "glossed" over, and maybe leaves one with the impression that if in a similar situation you should be able to rise above your situation and circumstances and do the same as Regina.I am certainly not saying Regina is wrong to have written an account of her life. And her account is not wrong, as it depicts her life, and her feelings, and we all know feelings are not right or wrong, they are just what we feel. And I am not saying she should not have a written account of her life as it occurred.I just wonder where the balance might be for those children who do not have four siblings and/or the same encouragement from teachers, etc.Now, lest someone think I am speaking in complete oblivion, I would like to share that I worked as a social worker for 20+ yrs with the first part of my career in child protective services/ foster care system. I investigated physical abuse/ neglect, sexual abuse task force team in my county, worked with intact families to hook them with available services to keep children in the home, worked with terminating parental rights to free children for adoption so they did not linger in the system and thus "age out of" the system.My point being, I am not ignorant of how the system works, and how it does not work. Do I think Regina and her siblings would have "faired" any better in the system and if the system had intervened? Not necessarily. Unfortunately I am all too aware of the abuse, physical, sexual, mental, neglect that occurs in the system. I, unequivocally, can say that the system can at times do more harm than good. But, it also, can stop a child's abuse, neglect and give them the solid, secure foundation they need to flourish.The system absolutely failed Regina, but what it then went on to do to Rosie was downright criminal. When I worked investigations our supervisors worked under the rule of, we always erred on the side of the child. This was not to say the adult was automatically guilty, but that for everyone's protection we would first and foremost protect the child. So in Rosie' s case there would have been too much "smoke", where there's smoke there's fire, and she would have been removed from the situation until we could better assess her safety, which most of the time allowed the child to speak freely in a safe environment away from the person(s) abusing them.Maybe Regina' s book leaves me feeling ashamed that I was a part of a system that could leave her and her siblings in a situation of ongoing abuse and neglect and allow it to continue on and on.

So emotional with a happy ending

Do not fail to read this book. Regina's story takes place on Long Island, where people tend to think "nothing like this happens here". Well, it does. This tale takes us on a journey of her own personal heartbreak, terror, and the constant fear she has for the well being of her siblings who she believes she must protect. Her mother is an abusive, alcoholic who beats and verbally abuses her children. She often leaves them either alone, or totally homeless to fend for themselves.Regina takes it upon herself, after her sisters leave to protect the little ones, Rosie and Norman. But she eventually reports this abuse when she is beaten so brutally that her younger siblings are removed from her presence. She is placed in foster homes, where she is sexually abused. What rang true with this book is that the author not only tells her tale with conviction, but she delineates all the emotions she feels such as guilt, hatred and love towards her mother, and a desire to find her real father.Indeed she does, but only after she goes to court and he rejects her. But the knowing is everything. This is a story of perseverance in every aspect of her life to succeed and reconcile with her siblings after her mother passes away. In the shadow of affluent Long Island where people turn the other cheek (I grew up there), the author takes us on one powerful emotional ride; one that will may you cry, and make you cringe, but on the other hand, admire her courage to handle all she handled successfully. Law school, college, followed by highly successful positions in government. The identification in my life with parts of this book was so painful, I almost put it down, but I am glad I didn't. It is a healthy thing to purge your demons, and I am certain that Regina felt that way in sharing her story with us all.This is a story of true survival, and a lesson for us all any time we may lose hope. You have done us all a great service by writing this book, Regina, and thank you for allowing us to become such a part of your story with you.

Wow. Just wow. How these kids survived is a miracle. Not just survived, but thrived. Their mother was absolutely horrible, yet no matter how hard she tried she couldn't extinguish the light inside each one of them. A light they each had only because they had each other. This is love in its purest form. I am so very proud of all of them for defeating their mother's hate with love. In the end, love conquers all.

This book is well written and I related to some of it! Brilliant that they all turned out very well

Hearing Reginas story and her family's through the pages in this book was informative, emotive and eye opening to what policies and laws actually look like in reality to children in abusive homes.

I Couldn't put this book down, read in one sitting. Such a sad but compelling read. What an amazing woman.

A well written book of a person who should have been ashamed to call herself a mother and a system that is so politically incorrect and quite frankly disgusting. Sometimes I was in tears and other times I was so happy and excited. What I find worse is that even 40 years later the foster care system in the USA is disgusting and horrendously run without any acceptable excuse by the government.

An amazing story of perseverance. What the author goes through in her life, no child should have to deal with, but sadly way to many do. Regina writes with such truth and honesty, almost bringing me to tears at parts but throughout she has an amazing spirit bringing her to overcome the cards dealt to her in life. Anyone that loves memoirs like I do will love this book!